No Use Crying Over Spilled Milk

Before I had Logan, I made a mental list of Things I Would Never Buy/Do As a Mom. Things like, "Go to the HEB in pajama pants" and "Give my kids pudding for dinner."

There's "Mom Who Takes Shortcuts" and "Mom Who Has Given Up." I'll be the former, I said, but not the latter.

Also on that list was "Buy a vinyl tablecloth." Having children doesn't mean living like you're camping 24/7, I vowed. It's possible to dine with linens from Pier 1 rather than plastic placemats from Target, I insisted. Placemats can be washed, tables can be cleaned, I said. A little spilled milk is not a big deal.

Well. Please join me in welcoming:



But please note, that's a Tiffany fruit bowl. Hell if I'm not going to go down swinging.